The Beauty of “Ugly”
There’s something about those among us who aren’t just not beautiful, not average, not plain or unremarkable. There’s something about the unattractive, the strange-looking, the homely. We’re so focused on being “beautiful” and living up to some crazy standard that makes perfectly fine people tell themselves they’re ugly that we’ve forgotten what real (physical) ugly is.
Now, don’t get me wrong here. I’m not slagging on anyone, bearing them any ill-will, or saying that people who fall short of “normal” are somehow less worthy of love or even that they’re not amazing. But I am saying that they’re ugly. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
I’d try to redefine the word, make it empowering or spin it so that it sounds enlightening somehow, but I don’t think it’s really necessary. As progressive as we all are (or try to be), we’ve got to admit that ugly is ugly. There’s even something magical about the genuinely unattractive. Something about a wonky eye, an over-filled lip, a unibrow provides a unique service to the public – it reminds us that not everyone is a walking airbrushed magazine cover.
Simon Doonan illustrates it perfectly, talking about Marty Feldman (pictured above): By owning his unattractiveness, he generously allowed the rest of us to feel less ugly. We need a Marty to come and challenge our Ryan Seacrest-ian obsession with bland physical perfection. Bring back the jowls and warts and general hideousness! Bring back Rumplestiltskin. Let’s start lowering the bar on physical perfection instead of continually raising it. Let’s return to a world where we can turn on the telly and, instead of feeling grody and sub-Angelina, we can declare, “I may be a bit naff-looking but at least I don’t look like THAT!”
Top to bottom: Susan Boyle, Steve Buscemi, Donatella Versace, Flava Flav, Sandra Berhard
Every single one of these people are ugly. But in some strange went-so-far-to-one-side-you-came-out-the-other way, they’re beautiful, too. They remind us that there’s a true spectrum of people out there, not just plasticky models held up on some kind of unreachable pedestal. Is it a little unprogressive to think, “well, at least I’m not Courtney Love”? Sure, but don’t tell me you don’t do it. And as long as you’re not persecuting the uglies in the world, not denying them anything or withholding love, then there’s no harm.
And, as a poignant afterthought about inner and outer beauty, the words of Sir Frances Bacon:
Virtue is like a rich stone, best plain set; and surely virtue is best, in a body that is comely, though not of delicate features; and that hath rather dignity of presence, than beauty of aspect. Neither is it almost seen, that very beautiful persons are otherwise of great virtue; as if nature were rather busy, not to err, than in labor to produce excellency. And therefore they prove accomplished, but not of great spirit; and study rather behavior, than virtue. [...] That is the best part of beauty, which a picture cannot express; no, nor the first sight of the life. There is no excellent beauty, that hath not some strangeness in the proportion. [...] one, would make a personage by geometrical proportions; the other, by taking the best parts out of diverse faces, to make one excellent. Such personages, I think, would please nobody, but the painter that made them. Not but I think a painter may make a better face than ever was; but he must do it by a kind of felicity (as a musician that maketh an excellent air in music), and not by rule. A man shall see faces, that if you examine them part by part, you shall find never a good; and yet altogether do well. If it be true that the principal part of beauty is in decent motion, certainly it is no marvel, though persons in years seem many times more amiable; pulchrorum autumnus pulcher; for no youth can be comely but by pardon, and considering the youth, as to make up the comeliness. Beauty is as summer fruits, which are easy to corrupt, and cannot last; and for the most part it makes a dissolute youth, and an age a little out of countenance; but yet certainly again, if it light well, it maketh virtue shine, and vices blush.
Edited: November 18th, 2009
I’m not the best at expressing my thoughts on topics that are emotional or important to me, particularly in writing. I instinctively feel that any words and formations that I come up with aren’t precisely what I feel. So for me to fall short on Veteran’s Day isn’t surprising, and it’s monumentally frustrating. But what I will do is to simply thank everyone who has fought and who continues to fight for freedom in the world. They’ve sacrificed so much to make sure I sleep at night untroubled, and so I don’t have to make those sacrifices myself.
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