Today’s post is a list of resources for National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. I wanted to make sure that any stragglers here got a link over.  It’s too important to miss!

It’s with immense pleasure that I’d like to announce my new site Apples and Porsches!

After a long time to think and some great chats with some great ladies, I’ve decided to move my digs.  While it’s been an invaluable learning experience here at JTP, I set up some expectations for the site and for myself that I’ve found to be not only naive, but completely useless.  I’ve gotten a bit of perspective and decided to make some changes.  I needed a new home with no strings attached (at least in my mind) – somewhere I can really be myself.

So update your bookmarks!

Thank you all for sticking with me and being so awesome.  I’ll see you on the other side!

Today is my 26th birthday.  At 4.20am (go ahead, make some jokes), February 2, 1984, I poked my lil’ peanut head into the world, stuck my tongue out at my mother, and promptly became a joyous pain in everyone’s ass.  It’s been a good ride so far.

Every birthday I like to take a look at the previous year and see what I’ve done, how far I’ve come.  This is what Year 25 held for me:

• I married my amazingfantastic husband
• I moved to Oshawa
• I held my job for the 6th full, consecutive year
• I discovered the wonders of the blogsphere
• I started Jaka’s Tea Party
• I helped define and found a new social movement
• I started collaging again
• I branched out into new media
• I read 17 books
• I got my first pap in 3 years
• I started growing out my hair with its natural colour
• I began manymanymany new and exciting friendships
• I supported and loved my family and old friends
• I fell many steps back on my path to self
• I felt the absence of spirituality in my life
• I worried about moneyworklovesexfutureeverything
• I gave in to crushing panic and euphoric joy
• I had to decide if I could afford to cure my cat (I did)
• I maxed out my credit card
• I stayed home instead of going to the biggest social event on my calendar
• I attended the last-ever Bad Film Festival at the KCKPL
• I traveled to Mexico for the first time
• I went to Disneyworld!

In all, it’s been a fairly quiet year.  We’re so far away from our family and friends out here that not much happens in my life.  Even my introspection has come to a standstill (which bothers me immensely).  A lot of amazing and huge life changes happened last year, for which I am immensely grateful to the universe, yet I look back and feel that I could have done so much better on a personal level.  I could have done better by myself, could have been more in touch with and respectful of myself.

Here’s to Year 26.

While I was away, I had a heart to heart with my momma and realized exactly how much I do in a day that’s not necessarily what I want to do and how stressed out that makes me.  In light of that, I’ve decided to take a break from the blogsphere for a bit (blogcation?).  Let’s call it until February after my birthday.  That means there’ll be no postage here and no wholestyle roundups until I get back.

No, I’m not quitting.  Yes, I’ll be working on other sekrit projekts in the meantime.

Here’s what I’ll be working on (besides, yanno, work):

• Designing a true home for the wholestyle philosophy
• Establishing better ways to construct the roundups
• Sewing more Roogaboos
• Collaging in mass quantities
• Branching out into using objects in collage
• Reading The Complete Sherlock Holmes (published 1938)
• Playing Final Fantasy IX (bitches)
• Going to movies with my husband

Sound like a plan?  Awesome.  I’ll see you back here in February, then!  And, just to tide you over, here’s a hair update for you:

You can flip over to my Flickr page to see the other good ones (the not-so-great and the family pics stay safely on my hard drive, thank you).  And keep watching this space!  Got a short announcement coming up soon (nothing terrible special, I promise).

Main Entry: abide
Pronunciation: \ə-ˈbīd\
Function: verb

transitive verb 1 : to wait for : await
2 a : to endure without yielding : withstand b : to bear patiently : tolerate
3 : to accept without objection

intransitive verb 1 : to remain stable or fixed in a state
2 : to continue in a place : sojourn

This year has been a time of change for me.  I moved to a new country, established a home, planned a wedding/got married, cared for a dying car, had a kitty crisis, joined a gym, started a blog, and founded a philosophy.  That adds up to a lot of stress on my part; historically, something I’ve not been very good at handling.

But this year, it’s been different.  I magically found myself able to roll with (most) punches instead of freaking out  (although I did fall into hystronics occasionally).  Wedding details blew up, and I managed to ignore my inner control freak to smooth them over, and I never turned into a Bridezilla (even after people told me I’m totally that kind of person).  I’ve gotten a stronger grip on my irrational jealousy, as well as my desperate need to please other people.  While it’s not all perfectly erased, my tendencies toward despair are melting away.  Maybe it’s maturity, maybe it’s short-term memory loss.  Either way, I’m welcoming the change.

And thus my word of the year is abide.

Not in the I’m-a-doormat kinda way, but in that The-Dude-Abides kinda way.

I’ve learned the art of abiding.

I met her through Twitter (after stalking her site and twitterfeed for about a month) during the setup period of my blog.  I’d been bitching and moaning about how very little I know about CSS, and she swooped in with DMs and eventually email to help me get on my feet.  Sweet, right?

We got to talking one day after exchanging personal email/Gchat info, and I explained my wholestyle idea to her.  Through a series of conversations spanning days, she helped me put my nebulous feelings into words, effectively translating all my crazies into a coherent and real philosophy (which you can read here).  I couldn’t ask for a better partner in crime!

After getting past all the initial “are you a crazy person from the internet” weirdness, both of us opened up and we started talking every day about just about anything.  Turns out we get along awesome (although that’s not to say we haven’t butted heads (cos there’ve been some doozy days)).  We bounce creative ideas off each other, vent when shit’s fucked up, confide our fears, get each other out of “the hole”, crack each other up, drool over fashion we can’t afford, and generally wish we didn’t live on completely opposite sides of the continent.

So yeah.

Birdie,

Thank you for doing everything you do; I couldn’t have done any of this without your help, encouragement, and persistant ass-kicking.  Thank you for sharing your fears with me and listening to mine.  Thank you for making me giggle at completely immature things like poop and farts.  Thank you for enduring my obsession with Robert Downey, Jr.  Thank you for reminding me that I’m amazing when I feel the least worth the dirt I’m made of.  Thank you for lending me writing space when I had none.  Thank you for sending me links to Bloggess articles and LOLcats all day.  Thank you for letting me comfort you as best I can when you’re sad.  Thank you for valuing my opinion.  Thank you for putting trust in me.

Like everything in our lives, we’ve had ups and downs in our short time knowing each other, but I think every minute has been supremely worth it.

Thank you for being my Super Twin (or Borg Sister, whichever it is today).

xxxooo,

You may remember a while back when Gala Darling raved about the Canadian miracle vitamins that she bought while in Toronto.  It seems like everyone, including me and the lovely Ginger (who reviewed the Daily Greens), hopped on that bandwagon and rushed to check out Genuine Health’s line of supplements for themselves.

Now, I’ve had a long history of un-professionally diagnosed mood disorder (which runs in my family) and Canada’s got long, dark winters, so I thought I’d give their happy-pill formula a shot, Multi+Joy.  Here’s the breakdown of “special” ingredients from their site:

Selenium: Clinical studies show Selenium supplementation can improve anxiety and depression.

Chromium: Studies show Chromium supplementation can improve symptoms of depression and control carbohydrate cravings.

Magnesium: Proven to help mood disorders including bipolar, chronic fatigue syndrome and PMS.

Folic Acid: Studies show Folic Acid may have a beneficial effect on mood-regulating neurotransmitters.

Vitamin B12: Those with mental disorders have been found to be low in B12. Leading health experts recommend 800 mcg of Folic Acid and 1000 mcg (B12).

Vitamin D: Studies show 400-800 UI can improve mood during winter months. Also proven to positively influence attention, motivation, and alertness.

Sounds pretty good, right?  And it’s actually been fairly great.  Coming up to the end of the bottle, I’ve noticed the following things:

• I fall into “the hole” less
• When I do fall in, I’m there for less time and for real reasons
• I’m chipper and upbeat more than usual
• I do crave less sugar, starch, and carbs
• I’m not boredom-eating
• I’ve lost enough waterweight/bloat that I fit better in my pants

I’ve been on SSRIs before (several years ago) because I was crying at cat food commercials and any not-100%-positive comment would send me into a two-day spiral.  Not a happy place to be.  But I went off them because I hated feeling so muted all the time.  Everything about me had been turned down a few notches, including my good feelings and perfectly normal emotional reactions.  I couldn’t stand feeling like my natural highs and lows had been wiped out in favour of a grey in-between.  So I quit.

And I noticed a slight resemblance with the Multi+Joy, but only in one very specific way: I can’t cry.  I know that sounds great, but it’s kind of not.  I still have the wonderful highs, I’m able to let small/medium things go much easier, I’ve got more emotional control.  But there are certain things that should make you cry.  Like little old ladies in the mall cooing over their baby grandkids, puppies and kittens snuggling each other, getting your feelings hurt by something meaningful, missing your SO/mommy/best friend.  Since I’ve been taking these vitamins (and I just noticed this recently), I’ll get the upwelling of emotional response, but there’s no release.  It’s very frustrating.

So that’s weird.  I’m not sure I’ll keep taking these, at least not at the two-pill-a-day dose.  I love that I’m not muted while getting the intended benefit; even Mr. Man has noticed that I’m not sad anymore.  But is it worth giving up being able to tear up a little when it’s totally normal?  I’m not sure yet.  I’ll keep you posted.

Back at the launch of this site, I wrote a little intro explaining how I got here.  I’ll repost the important parts for those too lazy to go back and find it (including me):

Enter Doe Deere and the ever-popular Gala Darling. Cliche by now, I know. I stumbled on these lovely ladies completely by accident and it opened up a whole new wing of the internet for me. So colourful! So positive! So hip! So sassy! I was totally agog. And so I dove deeper and deeper, discovering so many fashionable nooks and explosive crannies (my, but that sounds dirty, doesn’t it) that my head nearly imploded. What a wonderful section of blogsphere I’d stumbled upon! I fell in love.

Then the pieces matched up and I thought, “Hey…I should do this!”

[...]  Jaka’s Tea Party is a work in progress. I’m still searching for a solid theme to follow and a gajillion other things too boring or terrifying (for me) to mention.  I have no set posting schedule, no backlog of articles, no lists of topics, no general plan whatsoever as of yet. But it’ll come. The best advice I’ve read so far has been from the inspiring Ms. Nubby Twiglet – “While preparation is great, perfection is impossible. Waiting isn’t doing you any favors.” It’s hard for me to swallow, I’ll admit, but I’m taking baby steps toward changing my neurotic need for everything to be justright before I unveil it.

Six months later, I’ve gone through some good times and some tough times, finding out a lot about myself in the process.  I love that I have this little space in the web, but I often wonder why I do it.  There’s a lot of introspection that goes on every day to see where I want to take it, along with all kinds of metacognition about blogging.

The wholestyle project is actually the seed of my entire foray into the web and the impetus for this site.  I wanted to come up with a term for what I feel is the key to true style: knowledge and culture.  I’m so freaking passionate about this idea and I’m having a hell of a time getting the word out.  I want to shout it out from the rooftops, hand out flyers like a weirdo on the street, send postcards to strangers.  Thankfully, Miss Birdie has been absolutely incredible in her support and her help has gotten lots of amazing people to hear the gospel.

The dream is to have a network site where people can come to exchange ideas, share information, chitchat, write, and generally just create a community for the philosophy.  With any luck, my purchase of a supersekrit domain name will pay off in the next month or so and we’ll be able to move forward with the project.  I wish I had more to write about this, but I find that I have trouble putting the emotions into words when it comes to my passions (something I’ll have to work on).

Thanks to all of you for supporting me and my wacky ideas.  Yes, I struggle with it, but it’s wonderful people like you reading this right now that keep me at it and sorting out the kinks.  I’m glad you’ve all buckled in for the ride.

Only six more shopping days ’til Christmas! Thankfully, the wholestyle roundups are blissfully free of stress-inducing holiday posts about parties (attending and hosting) and gifts (giving and receiving). Dive into this batch of articles and take some time for you!

And as an administrative note, Jaka will be out of town until January 5th, so there won’t be any roundups until the second full week of the new year. I know, I know, you’re all heartbroken. But there’ll be great pictures of Baja when she gets back.

Arts & Entertainment

• Agent Lover: Late Night Feelings – An Interview with Nathan Appel Talking with a contributor to a new erotic photography site, FLNGS
• BoingBoing (Lisa Katayama): Why it’s Time to Lighten up About “Weird” Japan Why do so many love to gawk at this mysterious, foreign “other” that is Japanese culture?
• The Daily Beast (Taffy Brodesser-Akner) Who’s Killing the Soaps? With the cancellation of As the World Turns, a former soap-opera magazine editor dishes on daytime’s dwindling world
• Manolo for the Big Girl: Big Girls in Art – Les Toil’s Pinup Art Loving, joyous, and vivid pin-up images of large women, and only large women
• M.I.S.S.: Fashion Meets Music – Francoise Hardy One of France’s Yé-yé girls produces both signature music and style
• Poetic & Chic: Amish Abstractions at the de Young An exhibition of Amish bedding the abstract designs that pre-date Abstract Expressionism and Op-Art

DIY

• Blogher (Karen Walrond): How to Use Photoshop to Enhance Your Best Images Not to give people alien-looking waist/thighs
• DIY Life: Make a Sweater Wreath Got a boatload of old winter clothes you need to get rid of? Make festive decorations!
• M.I.S.S.: She’s Crafty – DIY Multi-Chain and Ribbon Necklace Use your old chains to create a bold statement piece on the cheap

Education

• Blogher (sassymonkey): Publishing Wars – Hardcovers versus E-books The debate between a book in the hand and a book on the drive continues
• BoingBoing (Ned Sublette): Principles of Postmamboism A portable theory that places music at the center of understanding and uses music to interrogate other fields of study
• The Daily Beast (Douglas Rushkoff): The Decade Google Made You Stupid Technology has changed your brain over the past ten years, mostly for the worse
• Discover: With a Blood Sample & 20 Minutes, Nanosensors Could Detect Cancer The next leap in eradicating cancer is happening now
• Neatorama (Stacy): 43 Facts about 44 Presidents Fun factoids for every US leader (remember: Grover Cleveland counts for two)
• New York University, Office of Public Affairs: NYU Researchers Develop Non-invasive Technique to Rewrite Fear Memories Reactivating fear memories in humans allows them to be updated with non-fearful information

Fashion

• Bonne Vie: The Rebirth of – The Hat Love ‘em or hate ‘em, hats are back!
• Cupcakes and Mace: 5 Style Trends of the Decade – The Great and the Ghastly A personal look at styles to love and love to hate
• The Everyday Minimalist: How the French Keep it Simple and Obtain that Fabulous “je ne sais quoi” We could learn a thing or two from the French
• Retro Chick: An Evening of Vintage Hair Styling Styling demonstrations by Flamingo Amy in Norwich hair salon Flint followed by some live music in Lady Luck’s Boutique
• The Skinny: 4 Ways to Achieve Mixmaster Status Mixing prints may be risky, but it’s one of the easiest ways to rework your favorite garments and get more mileage out of your wardrobe

Food

• Closet Cooking: Candied Bacon That’s right.  Candied bacon.
• The Daily Beast (Rachel Syme): How Top Chefs Stay Thin Yep – eat healthy, exercise, and indulge occasionally.  Sound advice, I think.
• DIY Life: How to Hold a Wine Glass By the stem?  Cupped in your hand?  What’s correct?!
• EcoSalon: Got Mortar? Along with the Pestle it Makes the Kitchen Grind Greener An old-fashioned tool makes cooking greener and more satisfying
• EcoSalon: Test Tube Steak – It’s What’s for Dinner If test tube meat was made tasty, affordable, and cruelty free, would you willingly buy it?
• Gwen Bell: 5 Teas to Taste Even if you’re not a tea drinker, these picks sound perfect for chilly winter days
• Serious Eats (Chichi Wang): The Nasty Bits – Pork Neck Posole New Mexico can churn out some interesting and spicy food (and culture)
• Zested: Christmas Croquembouche Croquembouche, a spun sugar tower of cream puffs, is French for “crunch in the mouth.”

Positive Life

• In the Library with the Lead Pipe: How do You Say No? The abil­ity to say no to tak­ing on a new project is directly related to men­tal well­ness and a healthy work/life bal­ance
• Positively Present: The Best Ways to Embrace Solitude When we have the opportunity to spend time by ourselves, we should embrace it and realize that solitude is a gift
• Sexgenderbody (Millie Jackson): Something for Every Body – Well into the New Year Positively reframing our goals make them easier and healthier to achieve
• Through the Illusion: Stop Apologizing and Start Rocking Your Self-Esteem! Combating that evil voice in your head that tells you you’re bad

Sexuality

• Blowfish Blog: Why Did Gayness Evolve? A discussion of the evoluntionary benefits of homosexuality
• Psychology Today (Nigel Barber): Ladies in Heat?  Scholars argue that women have estrus, or sexual heat
• Sexis (KalCobalt): Your Kiss, Your Fist What is it about fisting that captures the minds of its devotees?
• Tranifesto: Sexualized or Sexy – The Fine Line The fetishization of transpeople tends to erase “sexy” from the board
• Violet Blue: A Visit to the Musee d’Erotisme in Paris (NSFW) A visual tour of erotic artwork

Travel

• Almost Fearless: What Redesigning Your Life and Traveling the World Really Means The hard part?  Giving yourself permission to be wildly, irresponsibly happy
• Blogher (Pam): Sleeping Well While Traveling Tips and tricks for getting the rest you need while you’re on the road
• Just a Titch: San Fransciso Re-Cap Amy’s weekend in that city full of hills (and tasty coffee, apparently!)

Work, Money & Organization

• Penelope Trunk’s Brazen Careerist: Underrated Career Skill – Asking Questions How to ask the best questions in order to get the best answers
• Wisebread: Hold that Resume! 5 Red Flags in Online Job Listings What to watch out for when looking for work online